I’ve never been good at asking for help.
When my husband lay in a coma and I was about to burst out the most precious son on earth, even then, it was hard asking for help; being dependent on others to do what I felt was my responsibility did not come easily to me.
It still doesn’t.
As a mom, as a caregiver, I often hear how important it is that I take a break.
It is easier said than done, isn’t it Warriors?
I recently left my husband in the care of his parents and his caregiver for 10 days and I wrestled with myself.
I beat myself up for wanting to take a break, needing the break. I battled internally with the guilt of leaving him, not including him in my vacation.
I felt selfish.
I felt weak.
The truth is Warriors, even God Himself rested.
On the seventh day—with the canvas of the cosmos completed—God paused from His labor and rested. Genesis 2:2 (The Voice)
Now, perhaps your masterpiece isn’t finished yet, but I can assure you that you have His permission to rest.
The issue we face is that we don’t give ourselves permission, and to be quite honest, we don’t always give each other permission either.
I spent 10 days with my son, my parents and extended family. Try as I may, I couldn’t shake the nagging and rest completely. I always felt the need to be doing, to keep my hands busy and contribute to the work of our days.
If my mind and my body are busy, then I can avoid the pain, the guilt, the frustration, the weariness of my circumstances.
Isn’t that weird?
I’m tired, but I want to stay busy? It makes no sense.
Except that it allows me to avoid, to not deal with the battle at hand.
Don’t get me wrong. I did find some rest.
I got up with the birds and sat in the quiet serenity of my parent’s backyard, drinking coffee and reading. I played with my son and my nephews in the pool. I attended a beautiful wedding of an even more beautiful friend. Even my feet got pampered as I enjoyed a pedicure with my mother.
But I still carried the scars.
The thing with rest, my Warriors, is that it doesn’t erase your circumstances. You will still go back to battle. You will still fight against the trials in life.
But with renewed strength, fresh motivation and a nugget of peace.
Working rest into your schedule is important Warriors. Trust me, I’m pointing the finger at myself too.
We have to make the time and take care of ourselves.
Well, I write. I drink a glass of wine at sunset and read a good book. I talk to a friend who passes no judgement and I sing praise, sometimes even through clenched teeth.
And, if you can’t take 10 days away, at least take the time to get a good pedicure. Your feet need to be ready for battle.
How do you take care of yourself?
What do you enjoy when you take a break?